depression, Motivation

Forgetfulness

With anxiety and depression, my brain is usually focusing on a few dozen issues at any given time. This takes brain power away from my conscious mind, which is why I often forget words, names, or even faces.

Imagine having a computer with 3 browsers running and each browser has 10 to 15 windows open. No matter how fast your computer is, that amount of activity is going to slow things down. Now imagine that your computer is 10 years old. Your computer is begging you to slow down and read a book.

I often feel like an idiot when I forget words or names. It happens most often in group settings. That makes it so much more fun. Over the years I have worked to become more outgoing and personable, yet it’s hard to tell stories and jokes when your brain forgets basic words or names.

With an additional note, if you don’t think people with depression should drink alcohol, you should stop reading here. šŸ™‚

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Seriously, if you are going to judge, stop reading.

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With alcohol, the forgetfulness gets worse. After 2 to 3 drinks my memory gets worse and my recollection of the night is spotty at best. It seems that the one way to get my brain to calm down and stop yelling also makes my brain stop and hammer time. Potayto. Potahto I guess. At least the latter lets me have fun.

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