depression, Sleep

Stressed

The other night I couldn’t sleep. My brain was busy running every angle of a scenario through my head. I didn’t have the ability to relax my brain until this was solved.

What was this critical scenario that my brain was trying to decipher? Well, I’m glad you asked. If I was sent to prison for 9 months, how would I go about choosing my alliances in order to stay safe. Obviously I couldn’t defend myself.

Would I go for the toughest guy in prison and sleep with him no matter the appearance? If so, how does one determine which guy is the toughest.

Would I hold out for a really tough guy that might also be at least a bit attractive? This could make it a bit easier to deal with the need to pimp myself out for protection.

And what if I chose wrong or made a bad alliance. How does one recover from that. What if the toughest guy is a Nazi or White Supremacist. Are morals allowed in prison?

These are the kinds of things that keep me up all night and make it difficult to focus during the day. Depression isn’t just sadness or issues with emotions. Depression twists your subconscious into such tight knots that it can take your conscious brain ages to undo it.

Depression sucks.

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